A couple of male friends told me on separate occasions that they read my blog. I have male readers! That’s really surprising as my blog is full of pink. I sure hope I don’t alienate them when posting girly vain stuff.
Anyway, wore this the other day. There was a storm signal up in other parts of the country then, but our place was clear. A bit windy though. I realized that I like wearing high-low skirts on windy days. It feels so nice to feel the fabric moving and brushing against my legs.
I bought the clutch and shirt online just a few weeks ago. And the skirt a month earlier. While I got them all for cheap, I really wonder why I bother shopping for clothes and makeup and stuff. I rarely ever leave the house. It’s not like I have somewhere to go. I often end up overdressed for the bank or the mall. #fashionistahikikomoriproblems.
Also, unemployed people should really refrain from doing any sort of shopping.
Sigh, I guess it’s obvious by now I’m pretty worked up by my employment situation. I actually applied to a random job on a whim, only to find out that it’s night shift. Night shift is like, poor hygiene or a criminal record — they’re dealbreakers. For me at least. I value my health, I only have one body. So yeah, my rather whimsical attempt at finding something to do actually backfired.
It’s not much the lack of money but more that I’m kind of getting bored. I know some people are side-eyeing me by now, thinking I’m some rich kid who can afford NOT to work. But hey, I’m not bothering anyone. I don’t ask my parents for money. Sure, I live at home but then again even if I did start working they prefer I live with them anyway. There’s no difference. Also, if you had the chance to hold out for something you won’t hate, wouldn’t you? I bet you would.
At least these shoes are thrifted. I love those brogues.
Aaahhh, I’m sorry. I got a bit worked up. It’s just something that not a lot of people would understand, and I’m sick of being judged for it. I’ve turned down offers I know won’t work in the long run, even if it’s marginally better than the nothing I’m in right now. I know what I want and don’t want. I’d rather not settle for something when I know I deserve better. It’s not entitlement, it’s knowing honestly who you are and what you’re capable of, and being true to the future you want for yourself.
I’m very very grateful that I am given a chance to choose and wait. I really am. Please don’t take it against me if I actually take this chance.
It’s a way of life
I walked without looking back
for the sake of getting away from these gray days
Even hesitations, even doubts, come what may I will face it
I stand still on this street I once ran through
Over and over I think of yesterday
I held on to my trembling heart
running away and running after
I have a future I want to protect
I keep walking, believing in today.
-V6, Way of Life